MY LIFE: The Making of Coach Alexander (Section 2a: Shift)

Prior to my father's death, I was the type of kid who got good grades in school and played outside with my friends till the lights came on.  Following my father's death, I was heading into the 5th grade and there was a shift.

I went from dreams of being a student-athlete, graduating high school with great grades, going to Morehouse College, joining a fraternity, marrying a sorority girl, and becoming an architect, to the feeling of not caring about life at all.  I immediately became suicidal at the age of 10 & 1/2 years old.

My family took me to a child psychologist, which I shut down at the first visit.  I told him that there was nothing he could do for me unless he lost his father too, at my age, and that I wouldn't say anymore.  He agreed to terminate the visits.  After that, it was all downhill for me.

In the Fall of 1987, my mother relocated us into a predominately black suburb of Cleveland named Warrensville Heights.  Not only had my father lived there as a teenager, he also lived there as an adult and actually died in the very apartments next to the apartments we moved into.  God was playing a cruel joke on me.

Even though Warrensville Heights was once a flourishing suburb, it began declining right around the time my mother and I moved there.  The crack epidemic was in full swing and was taking place in the area of my apartment complex.  Crack mixed with the beginning phase of gentrification, plus the national gang expansion from L.A. and Chicago, was the perfect recipe for chaos in the black community, especially where I was, and my "I don't give a fuck" mentality adapted well.

Now don't be fooled, I showed great promise, even during those crazy times.  I was on the school wrestling team, I became class president in the 8th grade (didn't last long), I was a DJ for school functions/local parties/groups, and I made a name from my artistic abilities.  I was no dummy, I was just numb to life.  I had no plans to live in the future.  The only thing I spoke of, regarding the future, was owning a record label and being a producer.  However, the streets were calling.  I responded.